Journey 2 Zendipity

Last week felt like… shit, I don’t even know how to put it into words.

I was just not in a good head space, AT ALL.

Hurricane Ian missed us by a hair but one of the nights before it hit land fall was a nightmare. I have lived many storms, many hurricanes but never have I had so many tornado warnings back to back for hourssss. I mean it was from 8pm to 3am back to back plus knowing my family was in the path of Ian… rough. Then the next day seeing places that I’ve considered home, once upon a time, under water… well that was just the last piece that made my tower come crashing down.

I was just not in a good place. I was feeling exhausted mentally and physically. Emotionally I was just devastated and all of it together was bad.

I slept 16 hours and then at some point Friday I finally got a grip of it all and was able to take a deep breath.

This rollercoaster drop must have been a long time coming because the way I felt like I crumbled was so fast and “out of no where” but that’s just how this rollercoaster goes and rarely “out of no where”.

Luckily, I had an old friend keep me company through text one of the nights. They have no idea how much they helped me without even trying. A couple of people check up on me from out of state which was a kind and heartfelt surprise, my company was gracious enough to give me the time I needed. All in all I am not just lucky for our safety but my entire surrounding.

On Friday I also got an incredible opportunity. I have been on a whirlwind since. I am feeling like a palm tree swinging from side to side while I play out all my options and emotions. What a hell of a time for this to come. Still feeling so hazy that I can’t tell my intuition from my fears and concerns.

I have to ground myself, I have to realign and get back on my mat and meditate. This isn’t an option anymore, the longer I swim against the current the more exhausted I feel in every sense of the way.

So you know what, meditation, that’s exactly what I need right now.

See y’all soon! Sending you so much love and if you are in one of my old hometowns dealing with that devastation, please know I am praying for y’all and sending you so much love. I am happy to start a list of resources needed if anyone wants to reach out to me.