I started this blog 3 weeks ago. I decided today to use it in the series “Unspoken Beauty”.
Every single chapter in our lives come with lessons.
The lessons could be brand new or they could be lessons we didn’t fully learn the first go around.
Even when it is the same lesson, it will never be the SAME lesson. You know?
It always feels different though, and highlights the issue in a different way. At least if you are paying attention to the universal language.
I’m calling this chapter “Unspoken Beauty” and it’s already been quite the journey.
It’s a recently turned page but I started to see what the “NEW” lessons are about immediately and started to experience some repeated leveled-up lessons.
Here are a few of the lessons that I have been having to RE-learn but in a very different way.
Money Money MOney
1- Money Questions
Now this one was the most interesting lesson of all.
A few weeks before I lost my job, I was having a conversation with a spiritual friend who asked me a couple of questions that really stuck with me.
These questions really came at an interesting time. (Divine Timing) Since hearing them, I was able to start really better understanding my relationship with money.
1- If I could have the protector in me rest, what would my ideal life look like.
This question was regarding an ideal life. I have two very specific ideal lives that would make me happy, both extremely real possibilities and they are polar opposites. There would be no real way to merge my two ideal lives but there are ways to enjoy pieces of both. So as long as I figure out why I am so attached to them and which one is s soulful desire, which one is my security blanket.
My protector is the version of me that takes care of me. Therefore, in this image, money is my sword. Helps ensure I have financially enough to protect myself as needed. It also helps me hide my emotionally needs at times by going “shopping therapy”. If you know, you know.
Either way, one version of my ideal future involves climbing up a corporate ladder while the other is having just enough to survive and disappear (so to say).
Sorry, this question is hard to explain.
2 – What does money mean to me? Does it mean security? Does it make me feel safe?
Growing up dirt poor, money did become the root of the issues we had. Supposedly.
Truth be told, as I go older, I realized that it was the excuse. Granted, being dirt poor is not fun, does cause a lot of issues but the trauma I have has NOTHING to do with money or not.
In face, often, you’ll hear amazing stories of families united during hard times and the fun they had.
The problem in my own life, again as I got older, is the fact that I never recognized what role money was playing in my life.
Yes, we need money but beyond the need.
I didn’t realize that I did consider having money as security.
I didn’t realize that I considered having money a version of self-value.
I didn’t realize that I looked at having money as a necessity for happiness.
The last few weeks I really started understanding this, which helped me not stress so much over the finances. It’s been a tough one but an extremely important lesson.
From this question came a lot but the fact that I ended up losing my job just a short time after marinating on this one, I didn’t have much more time to focus further. Instead it was the next level which was a huge highlight.
2 – Financial Literacy
Since I had never really asked myself the questions above, or any money questions really, I never had a base with Money. I had no relationship with money beyond the money comes in, money goes out.
I made money and as long as there was money in my bank, I saw money to spend. I saw 3 nights I could eat out and 2 snacks I could buy LOL I saw shopping therapy or an extra movie I could watch that money.
The reason for this was a last of money relationship.
I never learned anything about money. Which is ridiculous given the fact that I worked with hundreds of financial advisors, but money was that conversation that I wouldn’t talk about. I had a bill app that helps me manage what/when I need to [ay a bill each month and I mark it off as it’s paid. That’s it.
I don’t know about you but I was taught that it was that money was a topic that’s not to be brought up, never to be talked about. Especially with people you know.
Now what I realize is that If it’s a topic that is not spoken on then it’s a topic you are missing resources on!
I think talking about money is HUGE. I still feel extremely uncomfortable with the money conversation but I intend on working on that because now I see how incredible it could be to have these conversations with people I trust. Eventually, with the person I plan to spend long term with. I know for certain I have friends that could be a wonderful money resource and in return, I could teach them something too.
So financial Literacy. This is HUGE!!!!!
I started watching documentaries that I found on Netflix, videos on YouTube. I started researching budgeting, best budgeting advice. I started relooking at my bills and seeing where we were financially.
My next steps are to open the accounts I need, close some extra accounts I have and take inventory of how much money I really NEED, how much extra I WANT and ensure I create a NEW budget for my next journey. A n updated budget because reality is, I thought I had one but I didn’t and each chapter of my life will require a new one.
I never understood how important financial literacy is but now, as a single mom without a paycheck , I completely get it. I have never been more interested in understanding and learning.
This was top 3 crucial lesson these last month.
If I can give any advice it would be to really learn about money and about your relationship with money!
Learn About Money
-Look up financial literacy, educate yourself. Knowledge is POWER
-There are free and cheap classes.
-Talk to trusted friends. Focus less on the dollar amount and more on how to grow the money.
-Talk to each other on budgeting tips, suggestions, ideas, etc. ( I am happy to start a post just on this for y’all to comment back and forth to each other. Just let me know)
-Get a better understanding on taxes.
-Retirement accounts & Social Security
-Home ownership vs Renting
-How to make your money work for you.
-Brokerage accounts/ ROTH IRA’s / Life Insurance
-Life Insurance y’all – Whole life insurance for you and your children. It’s not a bad omen, it’s helpful, it’s security, it’s even a financial asset.
-When you are older and cannot work, what is your game plan? If you are expecting someone else to take care of you, what if something happens to them? What is social security is gone? What if you have to stop working sooner?
-Learn, Learn, and then Learn some more.
Learn About your Relationship WITH Money.
-What does it mean to you?
-How do you view money?
-How do you view yourself when you don’t have money?
-How do you view homeless people or those living in poverty?
-How do you view yourself when you DO have money?
-How do you view financially wealthy people?
-What is your financial goal?
-Where are you struggling with it?
-What do you want to teach your children about money?
—
I am sure a lot of you have heard most of this, but if you are someone like me who heard it and blew it off.. I hope my struggle without a paycheck helps wake up your interest on this topic.
I am sending you all so much love and peace.
Please do feel free to reach out with any tips & tricks y’all have on money. Best advises y’all have to share ( any advice is helpful) I am going on a full month without a solid income, I will take all the knowledge and suggestions for my favorite readers ❤ .
Thank you for being you,
With all my love & gratitude,
-K
Journey 2 Zendipity 
Leave a comment